Phobias and Crystal

Forgetting Things Phobia

I have a problem with forgetting things.  I always have, ask anyone. I am guessing that my forgetting things problem is not getting better as I get older.

It isn't really a mystery, I know why it happens:  Instead of thinking about the task at hand, like putting my keys in my pocket or my helmet on my head, I am thinking about everything else: Pam, Ben, an article I just read, how Felix deserves more run support, lyrics to an old song, reciting the Greek alphabet, or Medicare PQRS requirements (don't ask).

I would like to think it adds to my quirky charm, but I suspect it is more of an annoyance for everyone around me.

Pam recognizes my forgettng things handicap, so every morning she reminds me to make sure I have my glasses, keys, cell phone, lunch, laptop, bike helmet, etc.  I assure her that I have everything every morning, but I still manage to forget something at least once a week.  It should not be this hard.

A few times, I have gotten a couple of blocks away before I realized I was missing my bike helmet. Other days, I have gotten through a couple of hours squinting like Mr. Magoo at work before realizing my glasses are resting comfortably on my desk at home. Or, I get a voice mail reminder in my email inbox and then I remember my cell phone isn't in my pocket. Earlier this week, I forgot my keys, so when I got to our secure parking garage I was trapped.... couldn't get back to the condo to get my keys, couldn't get my bike unlocked.  Luckily, I didn't forget my cell phone that morning, so I called Pam's phone from the garage and she bailed me out. She never gets mad about it, which I appreciate more than she will ever know.

Paper Phobia

Because of this problem, I have also developed paper phobia. I seldom write notes on paper, because I will lose them.  Instead, I document them and organize them on a computer. My desk at work is never cluttered and I can access anything I need within a few seconds. Just don't ask me to remember it.

Name Phobia

Since I don't trust my memory, I get very anxious at any sort of get together because I am afraid I will forget someone's name.  The more anxious I get about remembering names, the worse it is.  I was at a physical therapy association meeting about 3 years ago, and I started to introduce a colleague of mine that I have known for over 20 years and I panicked and forgot her name in mid-introduction.  She thought it was funny, ("You forgot my name, didn't you??? You a-hole!!!") but I was mortified.

My Crutch

So, my computers are a needed crutch for my horrible memory.  When a customer calls me, I am looking up their account as we are exchanging greetings so I can remember what part of the country they are in and refer to notes about our prior conversations.  During customer meetings, I take notes and distribute them to everyone mostly because I will need the notes for myself.  When someone at work comes into my office to ask me a question, I often quickly access our company directory so I can call them by name.

 I am writing this on my Chromebook that I bought a couple of weeks ago.  It has become a necessity for me... particularly, since I have it set up so I can access my main computer or files from our shared drive at the office, or the Clinicient application from it. Sorry to get all nerdy on you, but it is HUGE for me. (In the future, if I am talking about my Chromebook, do me a favor and just smile and nod as if you find it fascinating... I won't know the difference.)

Pam and Crystal

On more important matters, it has been a rough week for Pam. The fatigue, shakiness, and upset stomach have worsened.  She isn't horribly sick, but feels far from well.  Last week, she was talking about riding her bike again, this week she can't get enough rest and is back to drinking a Boost once in a while instead of a real meal. I'm sure this is one of the ups and downs we will continue to experience, but it is pretty frustrating to see signs of getting back to some normalcy one week only to feel like crap again the next.  In many ways, it is was less frustrating, just way more scarey, when she was really sick.

Earlier this week, there was a free concert across the street. I didn't know who was playing, but it sounded really good and very familiar.

Of course, I forgot her name, but it turned out to be Crystal Bowersox, who was an American Idol finalist a few years ago. We love her music and voice. She is kind of an earthy folk/country reincarnation of Janis Joplin without the heroin problem and granny glasses.

I found Crystal Bowersox name on a sign outside the concert and excitedly called Pam. Unfortunately, she wasn't feeling well enough to join me. She was feeling too miserable to want to go across the street.

Concert Plans

So, another summer is slipping away. Last year before the stem cell transplant, I bought tickets to the Willamette Country Music Festival and got a motel reservation in Corvallis.  We figured the timing would be about right. We will see if Pam is up to it or not when the time comes.  Just feeling well enough to enjoy something like this will be a big deal.

Bonnie is Fired

Bonnie is Fired (except when we need her)

Now that Pam doesn't need someone with her all of the time, Bonnie is no longer on the payroll.  She will miss all of the fringe benefits, like sleeping on our couch and listening to my expert color commentary on the Mighty Mariners. We will give her a second chance, if we need her for some reason.

One more milestone toward normalcy:  Pam no longer has to test her blood sugar and take insulin.

And another:  We came to Manzanita for the weekend and Pam's Dad, Don and I took our obligatory butt-whipping playing a card game called Hand & Foot.  We haven't played since January. I think our record is 5 Wins and 73 losses.

A Great Day in Manzanita

And another:  I am walking to Starbucks once or twice a week early in the morning. I really enjoy catching up on some work and planning for my work day while sipping on coffee.  Small thing, but it is really nice to be able to get out of the condo once in a while.

Here is a picture of one of the Totem Poles in the neighborhood that I took on my way back from Starbucks early one morning.

Mighty Mariner Twitters

I am intrigued by a guy from England who is an avid Mariner's fan who is on twitter every game.  I finally had to ask him what's up:

Back Home

One Fitty

Today is 150 days since Pam's transplant. Things really could not be going much better.  She is eating small portions of real food, and, importantly is now more generous with giving up courtesy laughs at my amusing repetitive anecdotes.

 Great sign.

Manzanita

I mentioned in the last update that we went to Manzanita last weekend.  Here is a series of pictures of Pam standing in the kitchen wearing the same outfit.

I don't know how she does it, but she somehow pulls off the bald head. Since these pics were taken, she has grown about half an inch of dark hair.  

It is like sleeping with a different woman. Very exciting. AND Bonnie is no longer living with us during the week.  Pam is now able to take care of herself.  Bonnie is coming in on days she has to go to the clinic, but that is only once every 2 weeks now.

Slowly approaching normalcy.

Ribs

Here is a picture of Jason's Baby Backs going on the Green Mountain Grill last weekend. See Team Green for more on the grills. Awesome.

Mariners

Thoroughly enjoyed myself last night, but I amuse easily. I was tweeting, keeping Mariners score, drinking some beer, cooking dinner, and the Mighty Mariners had a great game.  See my twitter page @HendersonPDX for a total recount of the exciting exploits:

Me tweeting to Dave Sims, Mariner play by play announcer
about his mistake when he mentioned "Grangeville, Oregon"
Someone corrected him before me, and he apologized saying
he meant "Grangeville, Idaho over by White  Bird"

Me Announcing to the World
About my Exciting Friday Night Escapades

Telling the world that Pam was watching a Mariners replay

My nephew, Joe, giving me grief

My idea of fun
I probably need professional help

Neostar and Horsies

Just chillin'

North to Seattle

 After my quick trip to Mexico last week, I took another quick trip to Seattle on Saturday to visit my son Ben and Andrea and their family to celebrate Ben's 23rd birthday. Pam didn't feel quite up to making the trip.

We first went to the Rainforest Cafe for lunch.  Haile was initially scared by the animated elephants, so she did her best to ignore them and color.  But after a while, she was a little more comfortable and would look at the elephants.  She eventually announced "I like the baby".  Little Aubrey Skye sat wide-eyed and quiet.  Here are some more pics.

Afterward, we went to the Family Fun Center.  Haile must have ridden the Merry Go Round (or as Haile says, "Ride the horsies") a dozen times.  Each time the ride started, she would hold her hand out signaling stop and say "Done Time", meaning this is the last time. As the ride ended, she would say "One More Time!" holding one finger up, with a big grin, and we would go around again.  Naturally, her Mom and Dad didn't think riding the horsies all afternoon was nearly as entertaining and Haile and I.

Goofing with Grandpa's Hat

Neostar is History

Yesterday afternoon, I took Pam to OHSU, so she could finally get the Neostar Triple Lumen Catheter removed.  That thing was a real godsend for Pam since it was placed in February with all of the transfusions she has had to have since that time, but it is great to get it out of her chest.  I was joking with Pam that I could jerk that thing out any time.  I did watch them take it out, and it was a lot bigger procedure than I thought it was going to be.  There is a cuff on the catheter that is designed to help hold it in place with scar tissue.  To take the tube out, the scar tissue has to be separated from the cuff. It takes a lot of local anesthetic and patience to get the cuff loose.

Off To Manzanita

"Done Time", then
"One More Time!"

Last night after getting the catheter removed, we packed up the car and came to Manzanita for the Fourth.  Since the "100 days" is now history, Pam was finally able to travel outside of a 20 minute radius of OHSU.  This is the first time she has been out of town since last September, when our last visit to Manzanita was interruped by her getting and infection and ending up back in the hospital.

It is amazing how much better she has been over the past week or so.  She is much more like the old Pam. Her energy, enthusiasm, and great attitude are markedly better.  For the most part, she is eating a normal diet just small portions.  Her fatigue is better, but she still needs to take a nap every day and her tremor is still noticeable, but she is able to use her computer now without much difficulty.

Life is good.